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It's not You, it’s ...




I’ve learned that when I can’t put something behind me or get over it, 
it’s because it’s a “me” issue. 

Specifically issues that I haven’t dealt with properly which have shaped my views, thoughts and feelings over time. So when I can’t trust someone in circumstances where I really have no reason not to… it's really about all the other times I trusted myself to trust others and the whole thing landed in the shitter! Yes, a nasty cocktail of past disappointments, pain, and anger - the kind you manage to swallow but can't really stomach! During my visit at the Shivanada Ashram in India, I learned that when you’re free from your past, then only can you have a relationship with your intuition or gut feeling. This isn’t just about trusting people. This is about trusting you. You can’t trust yourself unless you have a relationship with your intuition. You can’t trust your gut feelings unless you eliminate clouds of doubt and shadows of anger. To have a relationship with yourself – you have to want one. To restore this relationship – you need to meditate, reflect and gain closure.

Close your eyes take a deep breath and ask yourself who you really are, as an individual and as a member of this universe. Listen to your inner dialogue. Think about the last time you laughed really hard! Remember specific details and how they made you feel. And smile… if that’s how you feel… sit there with your eyes closed and smile!

Before you judge and start claiming I’ve lost my mind… Try it out. See how you feel for the rest of your day. Try it a few times. Take a minute or two before you wake up or go to bed. The whole point of this is to learn how to relax and get familiar to the sound of your own thoughts bouncing around in your head. As you become more relaxed and comfortable with your thoughts try to tackle some more serious issues. Think about something that’s bothering you or has been bothering you for some time. Allow yourself to feel your emotions and explore the possible reasons behind them. Think of things that will make you feel better. If you are resolved to deal with your problems, find a way to do so (even if this means having a make believe confrontation with an ex or frenemy). 

Then make a mental reminder to apply what you have thought of - every time you find yourself thinking about it again. Just remember, if at any point you find yourself uncomfortable or overwhelmed switch back to something that makes you happy.

Check out my post on the Benefits of Meditation
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Comments

  1. Sukhdev Singh28 December 2011 at 12:08

    A common way to break it off with someone... It's not you, it's me.

    But most of the time you really want to say it's the other person

    ReplyDelete

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